How to Turn Colleagues into Good Friends
It makes sense to form friendships with coworkers because you spend a great deal of your time with them. When you don’t get on with the people you work with, it’s so much harder to get through the day and be productive.
When your coworkers are your friends, your days will be much happier, and you’re likely to achieve more. Turning colleagues into friends can be tricky because you are changing the boundaries of the relationship. Here are some strategies to help you make the change.
Don’t Rush It
Friendships develop over time. If you try to push them, you may find yourself being pushed away. Friendships are likely to develop naturally if you do things like sharing coffee breaks and lunch breaks together.
Having a meal in a restaurant outside of the work environment gives a friendship a chance to grow. You can explore conversations and ask questions in a different context to work. You may discover that you have similar interests.
If you find out you both enjoy hiking, you could get together on the weekend for a hike. Shared experiences create memories and the more time you spend with others, the more you get to know them.
If you still haven’t formed any friendships after a few months, you may have to question your behavior. Have you invited anyone to go for coffee with you? Are you just sitting at your desk all day and unconsciously putting out a message that you’re not open to friendships?
Respect the Boss/Employee Relationship
You and your boss may find you have a lot in common and get on very well. However, becoming close friends with your boss can be problematic. It’s crossing a boundary that may result in a lack of the respect. Respect is necessary for the boss/employee relationship to work.
Be Yourself
If you want to form close friendships, you have to be yourself. You can’t put on an act to fit in with others – this will soon wear thin because it takes up a lot of energy to wear a mask. You want your coworkers to like you for who you really are, not for who you’re pretending to be.
Don’t Hang Out in a Clique
When you’re only relating to a few people and excluding others, you’re not only likely to cause offense, but you may find it harder to do your job. If Kim is excluded from your little clique, she’s not going to be happy doing you a favor.
Be a Good Listener
Being a good listener will encourage others to want to be friends with you. The conversation shouldn’t just go one way though. Sharing meaningful details about your lives must go both ways to create a close bond.
Jobs are often temporary, but relationships are forever. You may be promoted, moved to a different department, leave the company or be laid off. This shouldn’t discourage you from forming relationships as the best ones will remain constant through all these changes.
